So I am back. Let me tell you I achieved so much more out of my day.
Life was just easier. If people wanted to see me and hang out they kept to their plan. There was no way out of if. It was good. No sudden change of plans.
I loved being free from my phone and computer. I missed blogging but that’s ok, I wrote alot more, I studied harder. I read more books. I went outside and felt nature. Something which I have been struggling with recently. I have had a bit of an effect with my medication, but the period of two weeks before they increased it I was feeling so pathetic, bellow pity. Like nature wasn’t what I wanted, neither was my books or my friends. I missed alot of university again and felt myself slipping back to the troublesome dreams. I felt caught again in the spiral I had worked so hard to get out of. And for a minute to be honest, I didn’t want to get out of the hole I was resting in. In the weirdest sense I felt free, I know now it wasn’t freedom I felt, it was loss, I don’t know how I could confuse the two in my right state of mind. But somehow I liked to be alone in the dark with no one else, with nothing to do. But as soon as I stepped outside and felt the fresh air and the rain on my face I knew that I felt a loss of my responsibilities and all the things that made me me, when I was down and out. Take a walk in the garden and simply embrace the luck you have been given. Turn your phone off. Leave it at home. Free yourself from the confines of watching the same program every day at the same time.